I’m going to mention a site that didn’t score very well, but peaks my interest. Wacky Insertions is the name of the place and its claim to fame is chicks sticking all sorts and sundry in their snatches. At least, that’s what they proclaim in their promos. However, reading Mistress Tracy’s review reveals that the site doesn’t deliver what it promises. The galleries are softcore without much inserting and the videos are hardcore, mostly threesomes, without the weird muff stuffing you’d expect to see.

That’s too bad, since the site tour, sure makes it seem as if strange pack snatch behavior is waiting inside. I see some whore with a couple of giant salamis sticking into both her front and her back cracks. Another babe appears to be straddling one of those giant novelty champagne bottles. One of the ladies is trying to make her crotch flame retardant by loading up her pussy with a fire extinguisher.

I appreciate everyday objects taking on more than just a casual resemblance to cock, not just looking phallic, but also serving the same hole-plugging purpose. There’s the humorous side too. We’ve all read the stories or perused one of those lists of things people have gotten stuck inside a vagina or even in the case of some guys with vivid imitations, when it comes to making excuses, an ass cavity.

Nevertheless, I’m switching now to what is becoming a familiar theme for my blogs lately. However, it’s with a strange twist related to an insertion practice that one ear, eye and throat doctor warned me to stop doing at home alone. Those cosplay lovers over in Japan are at it again with their fetish for chicks dressed in funny costumes serving their every whim, now in a new, unexpected manner.

According to Ryann Connell in The Mainichi Daily News (03/01/07), one of those infamous maid cafes, where the women are dressed up in costumes to serve male patrons who paying by the half-hour for special services, offers ear cleaning. Yes, the gals clad in skimpy summer kimonos called yukata, get on their knees beside businessmen to spend 30 minutes removing earwax.

It sounds safer than paying for actual sex. However, as I mentioned, once I got a horrible ear infection and the doc said that no one should ever stick anything smaller in his ear, than his own elbow. I knew a friend whose father complained his hearing was failing. When the doctor safely cleaned out the auditory orifice, out came half a cotton swab. I don’t know if my pal’s dad had been to Japan, but it still serves as a cautionary tale. Even, if it risks falling on deaf ears.