Using a public washroom is never my favorite thing to do, but I absolutely loathe using the bathroom down the hall from my office. The reason for this is because some asshole constantly leaves a puddle of piss beneath the only urinal in that particular bathroom. I don’t know how one manages to stand at a urinal to pee and miss, but some guy on my floor has definitely mastered the art. Anyway, since I’m here and talking about urine, I may as well tell you about a few piss porn sites. So without further ado, here are some websites that you might want to check out.

Wow! As I write this I’m looking out the window and staring down at a beautiful woman on the street below. She’s got long blond hair, great tits and a killer pair of legs that I’m getting a great look at thanks to the tiny skirt that she’s wearing. As much as I love this chick’s other parts, I can’t take my eyes off of her legs. They’re just spectacular! I would love to… Damn it! She just walked off and disappeared out of sight. Oh well, this hottie may be gone but at least there are still websites out there that I can visit whenever I want to see some great legs.

Angelina Jolie was in the news the other day for going on about how great being pregnant is for her sex life. She was quoted as saying that being pregnant “just makes you a lot more creative.” Being a man and all, I’ve never been pregnant, so I can’t backup Angelina’s claims. I can however go to some websites that feature pregnant sluts in action and then draw my own conclusions.

Last weekend, I hooked up with a chick with big juicy boobs and ever since then I’ve been spending an unhealthy amount of time on breast themed websites. I’ve been dying to see, touch and taste this babe’s tits again, but my schedule just hasn’t allowed it. As such, I’ve had to use my imagination and take matters into my own hands since the cutie and I last saw each other.

I was hanging out with a chick from Calgary the other day and we got to talking about weird fetishes. Apparently, she grew up in a very sheltered environment because in her opinion, nothing was weirder than having sex with a strapon. Ten seconds on this website would probably convince her otherwise but for now, she still maintains that belief.

I met a new girl the other day and it looks like we’ll be hooking up in the very near future. This chick is incredibly hot, so needless to say, I’m more than a little excited. We were talking last night and she confided in me that she’s feeling excited too because she’s eager to get with a guy with a big cock, which I just so happen to possess. Yay, me! Apparently the last guy she dated had a miniscule dick that was essentially useless. I’ll be more than happy to introduce her to my member as soon as our schedules allow for it, but in the meantime, I thought I’d point you guys and gals towards some quality porn sites that showcase giant cocks.

I’ve got construction crews working in the apartment beside mine and they’ve been waking me up bright and early every morning for the last couple of days. They woke me up at 7:00 AM yesterday when they mistakenly tried getting into my apartment. Today they woke me up around the same time when they started destroying a bathroom with sledgehammers. These workers have destroyed my sleeping patterns and as a result I’m feeling incredibly sleepy. The only thing that’s keeping me “up” is all the women in uniform that I’ve been salivating over.